Depression by Fifi


(This is the 7th in a series of refections by women prisoners in Brazil and the third by Fifi.  In this reflection, Fifi shares her feelings on depression and more importantly how she can help others with their own depression.  Please think about and pray for the author “Fifi” and all the depressed women in São Paulo’s prisons.  Fifi has given her permission to share her reflection via this blog post although her name has been changed.

If you are inspired to comment on Fifi’s reflections, please add a supportive note in the comment section below and I will ensure she gets your comment.  

What is depression?  I have no idea but I experience it with a lot of “ups and downs.”

One moment I am happy and the next moment angry…and sad.  There are many feelings of pressure on both my body and mind; sadness, anger, frustration, happiness, disappointment…all in my mind as well.

The only way to handle it is to find a way to stay calm and talk to somebody.  Other ways to stay calm are by writing and coloring.  Everyone has their own way. And a lot of people (in prison) don’t dare to come out of their depression, because there is no need.

Also, here you can come out from your depression, but it takes some time.  And once you are out of it, and you are your “old self” again, you can be proud of yourself.  And you must be stronger!

So I want to tell everyone who has the same depression, “Don’t be ashamed of yourself.  You are not alone.”

I wannna ask those people to write something about their depression and their experience so we can share together and (work) to achieve to be better in life.


22 thoughts on “Depression by Fifi

  1. You are doing great work Jim, God bless you.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Please send Fifi, and the others, my love & prayers. One of my go-to verses is Romans 5:3 …”Let us rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope.” Keep writing and sharing, ladies. There’s always someone listening 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      • Thank you so much Suzie and thank you for the great works you are doing with your mission through Inmate Blogger. Its amazing how writing can be a healing force for inmates who often feel forgotten nas so alone

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Fighting with depression is challenging but nothing is more stronger then our will. Fight with positive thought process and definitely you will win this challenge 👍

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Heartfelt prayers for Fifi and all those in prison. Remember Matthew 25:31-46 and keep bringing comfort to those in need.

    Liked by 2 people

  4. Tiago…it’s great your email creating an opportunity for prisoners to share their journey…lest they feel forgotten and alone.
    Fifi, keep fighting the good fight and never give up seeking your old self…before the depression, or as I’ve found, perhaps a new self, one who is both stronger and more compassionate because of her sufferings. I’m so glad you have a sense of mission and want to help others. I find doing so gives you hope and helps you recover as well. And like you say, doing crest be things helps a lot, too. We are all imperfect, but it doesn’t mean we can’t bring more beauty into the world, each in our own way. So keep creating, and God bless all you do!


  5. Fifi, your words will speak to many people. Depression is like being in quicksand, sometimes it feels as though it is impossible to pull yourself out. But you have to keep fighting it, and every day that you do is a victory! I truly believe every single person on this earth is worthy of love and care, no matter their circumstances. I hope you can being to see yourself through God’s eyes, and not human ones. He is the one who gives you your identity. Sending you lots of love from Europe. Obrigada, Deus te abencoe.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you Elena. I will share your message with Fifi and the other women in the prisons we visit if that is ok with you. There is so much depression within the walls of the women’s prison.


  6. My prayers go out to you, dear spirit, and all of your sisters too. I give you a big hug. Someday in this world we will not put people in cages. Much love to you.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Marty Martinez

    Fifi, years ago I had done some time in prison, I know what it is like being depressed in and out of prison. I also had to find a way to keep myself busy to keep my mind off that place, from the constant prison politics, etc. I would shine shoes/iron cloths for people’s visits, draw, make/weave name tags, but none of these really kept me from getting depressed. I was going to church the whole time but it wasn’t until my last eight months that I finally had peace, I am not suggesting that you do what I finally did but I am just telling you what I did. I did have a son at the time and this was the hardest part of doing time, being away from him. So what I did for myself was I let go of my family, my son and any friends I had. I had to do this because it had a strong hold on me and I had to let go from within, and when I did that, that was the most peaceful time of my life, even while being in prison. I had finally accepted the reality of being locked up. But what what helped me the most was my relationship, not religion, with God through Jesus. My family & friends were still there for me but my faith in Jesus is what got me through my prison time. Most people think that prisoners use church as a cover up, so I’d like to say that many years later, I am still going to church; God was watching & protecting me my whole time in prison, and He still does. My heart and prayers go out to you. If you have a bible, I encourage you to read & live it, and know that Jesus died for your sins to show that He loves you, He laid down His life for you to give you eternal life and to anyone who will accept Him:)

    Liked by 1 person

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